The Office


What are you supposed to do with a member of staff who claims he wants everyone in the office to be treated the same and then comes back from lunch ten minutes late two days running and leaves five minutes early - on both occasions without mentioning it to anybody before he did it!

Oh yes, life in our office gets more bizarre by the week, it's like one of those scratchy East German animations from the 1970's which nobody could understand, when really it should be more like Hectors House where we all live happily ever after although experience suggests that cats and frogs don't really get on. Caroline told me before Christmas that she thinks of the office as one big family to which I replied that I'd like to be the slightly scary cousin nobody ever visits.

One of the joys about working in the private sector is that people do get treated differently. When I started work some thirty three years ago I was taken aside by a more experienced accountants clerk who told me to remember just one piece of advice, "always give the impression that they need you more than you need them." It was one of the best pieces of advice I've been given, I've tried to have learn new skills throughout my career and that's why I am where I am, career wise and financially. Angela began her tax career working for the Inland Revenue and quickly realised that however efficient she was she would only ever get paid the same as anybody else on her grade, she left, qualified and now has a house and garden I would buy off her in an instant should I ever win big on the lottery.

Brian isn't alone in having the attitude he has, he is what one of my colleagues calls 'a taker,' one of those people who thinks everybody should come down to his level of ability, enthusiasm etc whilst sharing in the benefits of somebody who does actually put themselves out. The whole office have become obsessed with him and his bizarre behaviour in a way nobody has ever experienced before. The only person who shares his office describes him as the most paranoid person she has ever met.

The older I have got the more I've been swayed by the idea of Karma, the equivalent of that biblical message that goes something like, "do unto others as you would have done to you," - apologies to any religious types if it's wrong. If you help people, are courteous, efficient, reasonably quick at your job and reliable then people will respond accordingly, if on the other hand you think everybody is out to get you or are getting something you feel you should also be entitled to without any extra effort I find you usually end up being ignored when it comes to promotion, bonuses, incentives etc.