Annual General Meetings


Well if anyone is still reading this after that sexy headline I'll begin.

One of the spin-offs of being an auditor is the dubious honour of attending Annual General Meetings, there are pros and cons to this. The pro is that you get to meet your client on their home ground so to speak, which puts them at ease, the cons are that if you attend the AGM of a club you get all the nutters, sorry members, asking you daft questions. The other con is that AGM's take place in the evening, usually round eight, which means by the time I get home from work there's just enough time to have a bath/shave, change suits, grab a piece of toast and leave home.

My first AGM was unforgettable for three reasons, firstly it took place on the night Janis was supposed to go into labour with Nathalie, secondly the alternator on the car failed on the way home and this was before I had a mobile phone But the third reason is because I wondered what I had let myself in for when it came to members questions for the auditor on the accounts.

The first questionner (?) asked me what set of books I'd had access to, did I know that the management committee had been fiddling the members for years and that everything I had been told was rubbish.

When he was asked to substantiate these points with evidence, he said he couldn't and was promptly banned for life, the Chairman resigned his position on principle and I was left bemused by the first five minutes of my first AGM!

Most AGM's run smoothly, in fact the number of questions I'm actually asked has dwindled significantly over the years, but I think this has as much to do with my improved presentation as anything else, and before I get accused of blowing my own trumpet I have been told that my presentation makes accounts understandable to anybody listening.

The pre-AGM meeting is always interesting because you actually get to meet and talk to the people who control the clubs, associations and companies who I report to. There is a world of difference in attitude between the first two and the latter, with privately owned companies the directors and shareholders are often the same people, the business is their livelihood and they may have borrowed money against their own homes to get the business started. With the first two groups it is usually a case of those who have been press ganged onto the committee and a few local businesspeople for whom there is a certain prestige attached to being a committee member.

Club rules often dictate that there should be a committee of twelve people, plus chairman, secretary and treasurer, as these people often do the job for free the tresaurers job is usually taken by the one member who can add up (and no that's not being cruel in some cases believe me).

Like all aspects of my work my personal politics don't come into AGM's or other events hosted by clients. I have to be seen as neutral despite some of the political comments that often find their way into these events, we act for Labour and Conservative clubs.

In fact it was at one of the latter about ten years ago that I met a Conservative MP, who, along with his wife, myself and Janis were guests of honour at the opening of a new extension. The evening was given a slightly surreal twist, firstly because a special motion had to be passed by the committee allowing the MP's wife and Janis into the members room for drinks before and after the ceremony, this was despite the fact that the first thing you saw on entering the room was a huge portrait of Lady Thatcher. The second thing that added an air of strangeness was the arrival of the person who was to open the extension - he was a Premiership player who arrived with the biggest, baddest, blackest minder you've ever seen - talk about ego.

Well tonight Matthew I will be wearing my Conservative blue coloured tie. Going to AGM's can be a little like visiting relatives at Christmas, you don't look forward to it, but once it's over you can't wait for next year!