Okay, on the left we have Blue Watch and on the right with have Staff Nurse Agnes Dogood from the Royal Fantasy Hospital.
What is it about uniforms? And why in women's fantasies is there one foot planted firmly in reality whilst men's uniform fantasies involve the sort of dress codes that would have most male patients needing a regular hosing down rather than a bed bath. Mention the word fireman to most women between say 20 and 80 and you get that look, you know that look. It's the same with men if you mention nurses or French maids, but look how differently they are catered for when it comes to selling the idea of sexual roleplay with somebody in a uniform.
I've never been able to see the attraction in men wanting their other halves to dress as schoolgirls, but then I have a daughter at school so perhaps I'm slightly biased, having said that the idea of asking a fully grown woman to dress as somebody aged 18 or younger is something I find appalling - but each to their own. Most uniform fantasies, with the exception of the schoolgirl, feature a uniformed person who is usually in a position of power: army, nurse, police, French maid, lollipop lady and obviously that's the attraction, the submission to somebody in power in return for sexual thrills.
Anyway, the point of this is that I've discovered the power of wearing a uniform - my suit - not for sexual favours but because people treat you differently, even people you see when you are in 'civvies'. I can go into a shop wearing my whistle and the assistants will call me 'Sir', the same shop, the same assistant but in a t-shirt and trousers and I'm just another customer. It has an effect on women I know who react differently to me if they see me after work and I'm dressed in my 8-5 'uniform' - no, don't laugh - some women find bald middle aged blokes appealing - apparently.
A friend of Janis's says I look sexy in my suit. Me, sexy? Usually if it's a contest between me and a piece of putty in a sex appeal contest the putty gets the girl. One of my sister-in-laws says the same - now the common theme here is that both the husbands of these two women are t-shirt and jeans types - 24/7 - so I suppose I'm a bit different.
So I've finally found a niche for myself: shop assistants and wives of van drivers.
P.S I had an Auntie who was a lollipop lady; she had a thin white body and a big sticky head!
9 comments:
It's a good job Staff Nurse Agnes wasn't around when I had my ultrasound scan a couple of months ago : could've been very embarrasing!
BTW, my wife is 45 today. It's also the day one of my colleagues retires : he started work for the council 45 years ago today. Just think, he's worked here for as long as my wife has been alive!
Lol, Shy!
Happy birthday Mrs Shy - I hope you serenaded her on the guitar Shy.
The second part is scary, I have three colleagues who have been working here longer than three of my 'girls' have been alive.
Yes, Happy Birthday to Mrs Shy...Can I get Staff Nurse Agnes on the National Health?
Its the smile thats shows a lovely open nature that usually does it for me not the uniform. But as I've probably said before I guess I'm not your average kind of girl..
I may have mentioned I am partial to fire fighters. That picture you have there is part of a whole postcard booklet full of hunky fire fighters and yes, I know I am sad. I picked it up for a £1 and used it to enter competitions. Seems that women (or gay men) may have been the picker outers because I had more wins with those postcards than any others.
One night when we were sat in bed reading I leaned over and picked my guitar up. I started singing that song by The Bloodhound Gang, you know the one... "You and me, baby, aint nothing but mammals".
My wife told me to F*** off.
I don't serenade her anymore.
Women are strange, aren't they?
ROFL Shy!!
Talking of Fire Fighters..
Two women are walking home after a girlie night out. They are very drunk and the walk home is taking some time due to their intoxicated state.
Eventually, they find themselves desperate for a wee. At that particular moment, they are passing a church and decide to go behind the headstones in the graveyard.
As they finish they both realize they have nothing to 'freshen-up' with so the first woman decides to use her knickers and then throw them away.
The second woman is wearing very expensive underwear and is reluctant to lose them, when she notices a new grave nearby with lots of freshflowers, amongst which is a very lavish bouquet with a thick soft ribbon.
Just the job' she decides and without another thought, duly drags the bouquet over and uses the ribbon to dry herself. Their taskcompleted, the women continue staggering home.
The next morning, the husband of the first woman phones the husband of the second."We need to keep an eye on our wives. Mine came home with no knickers on last night."
"You think you've got problems" exclaims the second husband "My wife came home last night with a card stuck up her bottom that said, "We'll Never Forget You - From All the Lads at the Fire Station"
Thanks Gavin, very funny a good start to my weekend!
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