Let The Hoopla Begin

And so the greatest football tournament taking place in South Africa over the next month begins in earnest today, well in Soccer City to be exact.

The hosts Ladysmith Black Mambazo take on Frida Kahlo each hoping to earn the right to top Group A for a few hours. It's difficult how to see Kahlo, despite some elegant brushstrokes and keen use of primary colours in her work can hope to beat the formidable eight man band from Ladysmith. Of course whilst the plucky Mexican can point to her use of symbolism, mythology and surrealism the South African musicians can respond by humming that annoying Heinz Tomato Soup advert. And don't be fooled by the numbers game, as both Napoleon and Hitler found to their cost biggest doesn't necessarily mean best, Kahlo was a boxer before the bus accident that left her with severe physical injuries so she should be able to give as good as she gets.

Joseph Shabalala formed the band after a series of dreams whilst Kahlo can point to the frequent use of monkeys in her paintings as a sign that she too had some strange nocturnal experiences.

All things considered I think a win for Ladysmith, whilst being completely unexpected, would get the Tournament off to a great start although ninety minutes of those sodding Vuvuzela horns will probably lead to a lot of spectators dreaming about forming singing groups of monkeys.

South Africa are quite possibly the weakest host nation since the USA back in 1994 and they should be on their bike well before the last match of the group stage which sees them take on France in Bloemfontein. The group could well be decided by which team scores the most goals against the hosts. Having watched France against Tunisia the other week I would have to say that a brothel is possibly the only place Franck Ribery and Sidney Govou are going to score this year. Raymond Domenech was recently voted the second most unpopular man in France behind that little bloke who sleeps with Carla Bruni and losing to China B 1-0 last weekend on Reunion didn't help his cause. The days of France fielding a side with three or four World Class players are long gone and France are clinging onto their glory days in much the same way they cling onto the remnants of their empire, in hope rather than expectation.

Uruguay and Mexico are two interesting sides if only because they seem to defy logic to be here in the first place. Mexico have now qualified for thirteen World Cups which in terms of bragging rights is up there with the champions of Luxembourg qualifying every year for the Champions League, they are in that fabled hotbed of international football: CONCACAF. They will however begin the competition with some confidence having just beaten Italy, the current World Champions in case you'd forgotten, 2-1. Before this however they had struggled against those football giants: Iceland, Angola and Senegal.

Uruguay finished fifth in the South American qualification group and needed a 2-1 against Costa Rica in a play-off to book their flight to South Africa. What Uruguay do have that France, Mexico and South Africa don't have however are two very good strikers in Diego Forlan and Luis Suarez who begins the tournament as an Ajax player but who should be at a bigger club (no disrespect to Ajax) come September. These two are backed-up by the veteran Sebastien Abreu who has a record of 26 goals in 56 internationals.

The winners and runners-up of Group A will meet their counterparts from Group B which consists of Argentina, Nigeria, Greece and South Korea.